Wig | J.LO | The Johnny Lopez

The season 10 premiere of RuPaul’s Drag Race proved these chilrin are snatched for their lives!

Three things I loved about the premiere: 1. Seeing the all the queens from previous seasons. This is how you launch the first episode of the season. 2. Christina Aguilera giving us drag queen realness. It makes sense since for some of these kids, the Moulin Rouge video was their first introduction to drag. 3. Vanessa Vanje Mateo’s commentary. Someone give her a YouTube recap series stat.

Three things I didn’t like about the premiere: 1. Vanje went home. 2. Vanje went home. 3. Vanje went home. I don’t like these cookies!

Here are this week’s drag superstar twinsies!

Aquaria is a Real Housewife of NY!

She’s lip syncing to this Medley… Dorinda Medley.

 

Mayhem Miller, how do you like this COOKIE?!

This queen is ready for her Empire.

 

Miz Cracker, you’re perfect, you’re beautiful, you look like Linda Evangelista.

Sorry Valentina!

 

Monet X Change is a Master of None.

But she may snatch trophies like Lena Waithe.

 

Kameron Michaels‘ muscles will VanderPUMP you up!

Yes, SUR.

 

Vanessa Vanje Mateo — Miss Jackson, if you’re nasty!

 

Kalorie Karbdashian Williams … with a Z!

 

The Vixen is looking for a new love! (Jody Watley)

 

Monique Heart is having a Ball. (Lucille Ball)

 

Dusty Ray Bottoms — Hey Kitty Girl!

Now & Forever! #Cats

 

Yuhua Hamasaki wins the Minnie challenge!

 

Blair St. Clair has shown her evil side. (Ursa)

It’s going to take a superman to beat her!

 

Eureka O’Hara – This Runway look is a winner.

Let’s hope her sewing skills are half as good as Ashley Nell Tipton’s.

 

Asia O’Hara has drawn True Blood. (Lafayette)

Side note: I couldn’t find a template with 14 pics so had to pick one queen to leave out of the composite. No shade Asia. It was just the luck of the draw.

ICYMI: Here’s the one drag celebrity side-by-sides I did for All-Stars 3:

For more pop culture recaps, reads & shade, makes sure you download the latest episode of SCREAMING INTO TRAFFIC podcast! Available on iTunes, Google Play, Spotify and Friendster!

Or just listen to it right here!

QUEENS
Oh wait, it’s actually just (top row, left to right) 35-year-old Real Housewives of Orange County newbie Lizzie RovsekBasketball Wives LA HBIC Jackie Christie, 45, someone named Carly Robyn Green, age unknown, pink weaved Bad Girls Club alum Natalie Nunn, 30, (bottom row, left to right) struggling dancer/singer/actress Porscha Coleman, 29, ex-Pussycat Dolls member Melody Thornton, 30, Teen Mom turned sex tape disaster Farrah Abraham, 41 23, and buxom former child bride sensation Courtney Stodden, 20, servin’ fish at the listening party for Jason Derulo‘s new album Everything Is 4 in Hollywood on Wednesday.

They are giving you charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent realness!

Moral of this story: Never judge a synthetic weave and beat face for the GAWDS by its cover.

Kim_Kira
Her brother Rob lashed out by comparing her to psychotic killer Amazing Amy from Gone Girl, but it’s another classic film character that has really captivated Kim Kardashian.

The San Fernando Valley’s perennial It girl took her platinum dye job – and curious bone structure – to the next level by going totally retro and channeling Gelfling beauty Kira from Muppet creator Jim Henson’s 1982 film The Dark Crystal.

It’s amazing what they can do with Animatronics these days.

World Music Awards 2014 in Monaco

Authorities were called to the red carpet of The World Music Awards in Monaco on Tuesday after a frazzled Pamela Anderson surfaced looking dazed and confused after becoming a victim of the synthetic remains of a blonde wig believed to have been stolen from the Kim Zolciak Outlet in Secaucus, New Jersey.

Luckily the 46-year-old mother of two’s chola brows and heavy eye make-up — which she has willingly featured on her person since the Barb Wire press junket in 1995 — were unharmed in the attack.

While it is still unclear why the $12 glorified rat’s nest targeted Anderson, sources with the Monaco P.D. say they believe it may have gotten disoriented en route to Britney Spears’ Las Vegas residency.

Despite the barbaric incident, Pamela was still able to present at the award show.

The weave was pronounced dead at the scene.

Taryn_wig
Orange is the New Black” star Taryn Manning appears to have wigged out at the International Emmy Awards in NYC on Monday.

For unknown reasons, the 35-year-old rocked a fabulous platinum ‘do reminiscent of former “Real Housewives of Atlanta” new mom Kim Zolciak. Don’t be tardy to the party, Taryn!

Perhaps T picked up synthetic weave tips from Britney when they co-starred in “Crossroads” together in 2002.

Richard_Salahi
For reasons unknown to man, Richard Simmons traded his trademark Brillo weave and short-shorts for a blonde Michaele Salahi Rite Aid wig and reddish orange getup in L.A. on Tuesday.

The 65-year-old is sweatin’ to “The Real Housewives of DC.”

Cher_WIGGypsies, tramps and weaves!

A refurbished Cher “performed” her new song “Woman’s World” on “The Voice” last night and nearly caused a PETA meltdown when she showed up wearing what appears to be the slaughtered furry remains of Animal, Daffy Duck and Pepe Le Pew’s carcasses on her 67-year-old head.

Do you believe … that three wigs are better than one?